Making your bed when you’re depressed

You open Instagram, and are immediately greeted with an influencer’s morning routine, complete with face masks, matcha, and a morning run–oh, and don’t forget: making her bed in a beautiful bedroom free of clutter. For those struggling with depression, that kind of morning routine can feel impossible to imitate. Including the part where you make your bed.

People commonly say it takes less than a minute to make one’s bed, but that’s an exaggeration. Think about it. You just woke up: tired, groggy, not ready for another day, and now you have to exert energy right away to make sure covers are tightly tucked in, blankets are even, pillows are fluffed. That’s both mental and physical energy you’re using right off the bat, before you’ve even had your morning coffee.

But it’s undeniable: those tucked-in beds with the wrinkle-free sheets and fluffed up pillows look downright stately.

It makes one wonder: is it the person who made the bed, or the bed who makes the person?

In his book, “Atomic Habits,” habit engineer James Clear argues that new habits tend to stick when they are associated with a desired identity. (Yes, this is a rough summary.)

When the topic of making beds comes up–it used to be quite the icebreaker during the pandemic–you’ll often hear a sense of pride and accomplishment in people’s voices when they reply in the affirmative. The implication is, “I am someone who makes my bed in the morning. I’m that kind of person.” Similarly, there’s often a sense of shame and sheepishness from those who admit (confess?) not to be of this camp.

But, for those with depression, what if the act of making one’s bed was viewed not as a reminder of one’s success or failure, but more as a tool to exercise autonomy during an emotionally turbulent time?

Might that help?

What would it feel like to look at that kind of masterpiece in our own room, of our own doing, despite going through a wave of crippling depression?

And maybe, since habits stack upon themselves, the repetitive act of making one’s bed just might pave the way for even more habits, ones that are healthy acts of resistance to negative thought patterns?